How can I get my 3.5 year old son to improve his self-help skills?

For instance, dressing himself...my son will not dress himself at all. I am sure he could put his legs in the pant holes if he wanted to, but he won't pull his pants up or put his shirt on. He doesn't know how to put his shirt on yet. I should probably also mention that he is what you would call a special needs child...he has PDD-NOS, a very mild form of Autism and is in an integrated preschool where he gets physical therapy, occupational therapy, and speech therapy. He also needs my help to put on his coat...he can't/won't put it on by himself, he cannot button his coat (his fine motor skills are delayed). I have to put his socks and shoes on him every morning for preschool because he won't do it himself. At 3.5 years old should my son already be dressing himself completely by himself? I also feel bad because he's still not potty trained... he will sit on the potty and today he peed on the floor although I think he was trying to make it to the potty... I just feel like my son is so behind. Please tell me there are other 3.5 year olds out there who aren't potty trained and who can't dress themselves. He will take off his pants by himself and take off his shirt with a little assistance I guess getting dressed is harder though. How can I work on these skills?How can I get my 3.5 year old son to improve his self-help skills?
Very tough - you must have a lot of love.



I've got a few friends with autistic kids - I understand that it is very common. If you want me to introduce you to them, let me know.



Sounds like a heck of a lot of patience and repetitious demonstrations. That's what has worked for us. I'm guessing you've already researched lots on how to parent autistic kids.



It's ok if he's behind. We're not on earth to compete with each other - we're here to develop character. Progress will never go as fast as we want it to, and that's ok. The important thing is to learn selflessness and love.



On a more sensitive note, children with developmental problems are in good shape in the eternal scheme of things. I'd suggest studying and praying about eternal life. This has brought me tremendous peace - even during hard times.
Get him the doll that have buttons and zippers. He cannot learn this skills unless you make it interesting.

You can also make a Blanket a teaching tool by adding large colorful zippers, buttons and flaps. Make sure the Button are at least 2 inches in size and the button holes are exaggerated. Make it a game.How can I get my 3.5 year old son to improve his self-help skills?
most 3 year olds cant completly dress themselves yet though they can help you out with it..my niece did at 3 but even she chose to be lazy alot of times..i also know a little boy who will be 4 in february and just toilet trained..just keep encouraging him, maybe when it comes to dressing ask him to try to do it himself first and then you will help after..
Ah, it's normal

You most have lots of love, I respect your determination



I am sorry I don't have any advice for you though, but that's better than a fake answer I guess.



Good LuckHow can I get my 3.5 year old son to improve his self-help skills?
No 1 thing not to do...DO NOT MAKE EXCUSES FOR HIM! DO NOT PUT LIMITATIONS ON HIM BECAUSE HE HAS A DISABILITY! Have the same expectations for him as you would for any child and encourage him constantly. He won't start doing for himself or learn how to do things if you give in to his refusal and do it for him either. Your son is capbale of doing anything that he sets his mind to so the main thing is to give him the confidence in himself he will need to carry him through his life. Good Luck!
There's tons of 3.5 year olds who don't have these skills!

He should be on the path to developing them, but it's not something you need to be really worried about right now. If you want to teach him to dress himself, just talk him through it.

Say things like:
"Sit down on your bum."
"Where does your foot go when you're putting pants on?"
"Now what do you think you need to do?"
"Do you need help with the buttons?"

He will probably still need help with things like buttons and zippers, and that's totally normal. It's even alright for you to help him pull his pants up after he gets his legs in. The first step is having him communicate to you the steps for getting dressed. Being able to do it physically will come next.