1st grade teacher question.?

My 1st grader has the same teacher my older son did. I really didn't care for her the first time around. She's a bit rigid and my older son didn't do well in her class. He has ADHD and he was having a lot of difficulty paying attention. He was not yet reading and he struggled in her class. Now my next son has her. He has some sensory issues but was already reading when he began kindergarten and is already doing some very simple multiplication. He gets math. He reads well. But now he's not able to do his "work" on time and sometimes refuses to do it. He loses recess every day and he just hates school. When I first saw his teacher this year she said he looks so much like my older one that she keeps calling him by my older son's name. I think that's really odd because they do not look alike, and if you didn't know they were brothers you wouldn't know by looking at them. I'm very frustrated because this teacher is well liked by other parents and I know that my son is partly to blame because he can be stubborn. However, she's so rigid and won't budge that a power struggle began the first week of school. I think she's pushing all the time, there is a lot of worksheet type work and she's all about the "work." I've spent a lot of time with my first grader desensitizing him (auditory, touch and food textures) and the first half of kindergarten last year was quite a challenge -- but by the second semester he loved school. We had a GEI meeting for him last year and he has a diagnosis for PDD-Nos, but I don't think his teacher reviewed his file even after I told her about it (maybe she thinks I'm making excuses for him?). It is possible there is an attention problem because his mind does wander and it runs in our family, but I think with just a little give and take he should have no problem. There are 16 kids in the class and she says she can't make any exceptions, which I respect, but the rules are so arbitrary. You can't put your hoody up in class. You can't sharpen your pencil after the morning bell rings (they have to borrow a pencil from her and it becomes kind of a disciplinary thing -- you should have done this before the bell, but they aren't allowed in the classroom until 10 minutes before the bell rings. It just seems excessively rigid to me for first grade). He hates school and gets frequent stomach aches. I'm making him go, I eat lunch with him a lot and I volunteer in the library. I'm letting him know that his teacher is in charge and he has to respect her and follow the rules. I don't want to be "one of those parents" who thinks their children never do anything wrong and it's always someone else's fault when there's a problem, but I really, really don't think this is a good personality fit. I seem to be the only parent who doesn't love this teacher, or maybe no one else is saying? I've never heard of anyone switching teachers at this school so I doubt it's an option. I also don't want my son to think he can switch teachers every time he gets one he doesn't like. I'm not sure what I should do and would welcome any and all suggestions.|||I am sorry to hear of your experience- not every teacher (even 'well-loved' ones) can be a perfect fit. It would seem to me that if your son is identified with Pervasive Developmental Disorder/ Non- Specified, that he would qualify for an IEP (Individualized Education Plan) or accommodations via a 504. Either of these documents would allow for your child's needs to be met within acceptable parameters. Please speak with a member of the school's Child Study Team regarding this. However, if the school is not a public one, there may not be these services available. Barring that, a Parent- Teacher conference is called for ASAP. It is always best to meet with a teacher directly first before involving the principal. Be persistent though in your advocacy for your son. Best Wishes!|||Here's a GREAT message board for help--





http://www.millermom.proboards107.com/in鈥?/a>|||You could set up a conference with her, and explain to her your situation, and how it affects him and your family...|||Bandit - RIGHT ON! That's exactly what I was thinking.|||My brother was in a situation similar to this and to this day [he's now a freshman in highschool] he hates school. He's gotten veryy lazy with schoolwork and although he has the ability to do well, he refuses to do so. If i were in your position i would talk to somone in the office and push for a teacher switch. The pricipal should be accomadating if you explain this situation to him/her.


Best of luck to you and your son!|||You need to advocate for your child. I would set a meeting up with the teacher and the principal to discus your concerns. There are many teachers who have no business working with certain children. I have never had a student pulled from my class, but there are two teachers on my grade who have had it happen several times since I have been working there. I know that in at least one instance, it was a godsend to the child. They were failing in the first class, and really blossomed in the other.





Don't accept anything other than what you think is the right solution for your child.|||I'm a teacher and know that there are some super rigid teachers out there - I work very closely with one of them and it is difficult even as a co-worker.


Typically in these situations I side with the teacher but honestly I think you have more than respectful and I think you should talk to the principal. Do it in the same way that you wrote this question. Approach the principal gently with reasons. Tell him what you've tried etc...Tell him that it just isn't a good fit and you would be willing to put him in any other class than hers. You can't be picky though because once you get picky they will think you have another agenda. If your agenda is that you want your kid out regardless then they will probably try to accomodate you. Also ask the principal to not put this towards the teacher in a way that will make her treat your son any differently.


You can't change teachers like this - they are old school and have a hard time seeing tha ttheir ways are not good.


Typically, they do put siblings with teachers they've had in the past because they think you have built a relationship with the teacher. It isn' weird that she has called your son by your other son's names. Sometimes I do that and that is only because I have in my brain associated the family name with a child's name. She doesn't mean anything about it.