Is it acceptable for the school to send my child with autism home every time he smells like poop?

My son who is almost seven years old is in kindergarten. He has PDD-NOS (autism spectrum disorder), Sensory Processing Disorder, as well as some other diagnoses. He is on some medications which make him constipated. His pediatrician recently added Mirilax to help him move his bowels easier. When he has BMs he will do them in his pants without knowing he went. Sometimes he has little streaks in his underwear (oozing from being constipated). Other times he will successfully make it to the toilet, but refuses to wipe so he gets streaks of poo on his underwear.



He has a 1:1 aid, and is in a SPED class at his school. Yesterday the nurse confronted me about the teacher's complaining he was smelling like feces. I told her that it might be a side effect of his medication. She said "yes but it also might just be immaturity". This morning when I dropped him off I was getting him out of the van and I could smell him. He was fine when we left the house. We went inside and I asked the nurse if we could use her bathroom. She let us so I cleaned him up and helped him put some clean clothes on. Then on our way out I stopped and talked to her about how the pediatrician put him on Mirilax yesterday when we seen him and told her that this might cause him to have loose stools for a few days while we are finding the right dose.



She told me that everytime my son smells like poop, has streeks in his underwear, oozes, or poops himself that I will be called to either come to school and clean him up, or take him home, give him a bath, and be expected to bring him back again. She said that she can not help him because of his age. She said children his age have better memories than preschoolers do. She then went on to tell me that some nurses might like at hospitals but she is not going to. He has always had extra clothes... three complete outfits, along with flushable wipes at school since the first day. I don't understand why they can not help him clean himself at school? I think it is unacceptable for them to call me everytime he smells. I could see if it was down his legs and a big mess, but they are all contained in his underwear. It has not been easy teaching my son his self help skills. He will quickly learn that if he poops himself, does not wipe, etc. that Mommy will have to come get him. That might cause some regression in the skills that have been hard for him to learn. Do you think that it is acceptable for the school to expect me to come get him everytime he smells?Is it acceptable for the school to send my child with autism home every time he smells like poop?
I can feel your frustration. It is extremely difficult to parent a child with autism - twice as hard to teach the basic skills that other children learn instantly and then there is the regression at the slightest change.

I am sure the nurse is stating school policy, but the teacher does not asound as if she is aware of the situations that can arise with children with autism.



As a parent, I would request that the IEP team be reconvened to discuss this issue. You might ask your son's doctors to write of his current medical situation to add to the discussion. If there is a special ed supervisor who oversees the autism program, invite them also and finally, the supervisor of the school system's nurses.



At the meeting, request that a medical plan be put into effect for your son. This will detail what is to be done when the situation arises and who is responsible for implementing each step. The doctors will have the opportunity to have input at this level.



In addition, ask that his special ed teacher %26amp; speech therapist develop social stories to help your son learn what to do when he feels the need to use the bathroom or when he has an accident.



Finally, since wiping is an issue, it sounds as if he might have some sensory issues with the whole 'poop" idea. If he is not already receiving it as a related service, make sure you request an Occupational Therapy evaluation through an IEP review/revision.



Hope this gives you some ideas. Best of Luck!
if its a public school, i dont think even special ed classes put wiping childrens feces in their job description. I would suggest a special school for children with related illnesses or home schooling.Is it acceptable for the school to send my child with autism home every time he smells like poop?
Yes. Sorry about your son.
Unfortunatly, yes. But in your defense the nurse sounds like a beeeeatch.Is it acceptable for the school to send my child with autism home every time he smells like poop?
It's sucks, but yes.
Hun i have to agree with some of the answers here, i know for a fact that 'some' children do have these problems But.. i know there is a new law about cleaning children that have messed or wet themselves especially Special needs children.Thomas %26lt;%26lt;%26lt;here was in diapers/nappies up until he was 8 and the school could change him because he was in diapers, but when it came to changing him to pants then they couldn't do and i was also called into school and had to change him myself, so yes i do agree they are doing what the new school law says they should do, i know its tough Hun but its tough for them sometimes when their hands are tied
My child has issues. Miralax is not the best choice for her. I give her two strips of Colace every night (Fleet brand Pedia-Lax, which also comes in a liquid. There is a penguin on the box).

She sits on the potty stool for an hour watching the Powerpuff girls every morning. Usually if she poops in the morning, she is OK for the rest of the day.

It works pretty well for us, if I am consistent with the routine.

You might contact the local school board to find out if it is legal for the 1:1 aide to wipe him up. You might try to find out if they can get an aide that is able to wipe him up. Legally, there are all kinds of issues with helping a child with cleaning himself, because of new rules governing sexual misconduct (as insane as that sounds).

Your child is entitle to a free and equal education. The school is required to send a teacher home with your child if necessary. You might ask the principal if that would be better for the school . Not that this is what you want- but it may help in your argument for an aide that can attend to bathroom issues. It is no good for anybody to have your child miss so much school.

I really think it is reasonable to send a child home that smells like feces. It is disruptive to the classroom environment. There is a concern about spreading disease. Other parents and teachers might have concerns about Hepatitis B contamination.

I wish all schools had a bidet for this kind of problem. but I do not know how you would get a school to spend the money.

I find it unfortunate the school nurse has been so unprofessional. You should report her to the principal and the Board of Nursing for refusing to perform duties part of her job description and within nursing scope of practice.
Yes, I think it's acceptable for the school to call you in to do it. It may be a pain but it's part of what needs to be done. The school needs to protect themselves. All it takes is one child saying that the nurse did something inappropriate and the school is in deep do-do (no pun intended) and the nurse loses their job.
i worked with kids with austim---we helped tehm with their hygiene no matter what their age--without sending them home or calling teh parent





TEACHING can include teaching hium to clean himslef up.....that is very common with children with dsiabilities
They are there to teach not clean up... i would understnad if it happened just a little bit but it seems like it happens everyday. lower the doseage it isnt their responsibillity
I do not know what the law is, but this is ridiculous. I have been a school teacher for 17 years. I have cleaned bottoms and change soiled pants. Good teachers and nurses even keep a stock pile of clothes for accidents. I'm not sure but I think the 1:1 aid is the one who should be taking care of this. That's what the aid is partly for. The school district is receiving money because they have your child with his certain disability. Make them do their job!
Just wanted to say that I think JazzyGee has given you some excellent advice. I feel for you and understand your frustrations with the school. I really thought there were laws now days that cover these kind of things with special education children and protect their rights to get an education. My niece that I have custody of is in special ed and there is a boy in here class that wears diapers and they change him everyday when needed. He even has a toddler bed in the classroom for naps and this is in high school. With a seven year old I really cannot believe this is such a big issue. Good luck and stand your ground. You are right and are not asking too much.
If he has a 1:1 aid that person should be qualified to work with him and all the challenges that come along with his condition. The teacher was wrong to say he was immature. He has autism. Geish!



Get a doctor to write a note/letter to the school explaining the special needs and medication issues or find a different school. If I were you I would be fighting the school to get him through the phase he is in because he is growing at the rate he was born to grow at. I would go to the principal or the school board.



Your teacher's lack of support shows a system that will allow for him to fail and be teased later on in his school life. This is not a normal sitaution.They need to realize it and stop being so prissy.
Wow. Some of these answers are just ignorant.



Sounds like the nurse is stating a policy. Find out where the policy came from and explain your son's situation completely. If the nurse is concerned about her personal liability (and it sounds to me like she is) the 1:1 assistant should be available to stand by as the nurse cleans your son.



I agree that your son will quickly poop to make you show up.



Stand your ground. The nurse does sound like a hag.



Final thought: you can stop the med that causes it. Constipation won't kill him. Give him more fiber and prunes, instead.
No, the school should be able to deal with this.

A mainstream school my sister was at was perfectly capable of changing her nappies (diapers).



Maybe they are concerned about 'touching' your child?



You need to point out that his age is nothing to do with his mental state, and thus they can't refuse to deal with it. It doesn't even sound as if it's a major issue. If he has changes of clothes and can be instructed to wipe, they can easily sort this from outside of a cubicle, directing him. And that your retrieving him every time something goes wrong would be detrimental to him.



It is not acceptable, no. (My youngest sister has just been potty trained at five, and is doing fine- she was neglected, and had severe sores when she was a lot younger, so she was always good at holding it, it was just when how and where to do it...) But when we sent her to school in pants (knickers, panties?) The school refused to believe that we'd taught her, and would put her in nappies as soon as my mother left her. Then she'd be convinced that because she was in a nappy she'd wet herself, and would hold it all day until she got home, often ending in accidents....

We pulled her out of the school this month, as all communication had broken down. A rival school is offering to take her and do better! :)



Don't bow down to the schools wishes, if it means refusing to pick him up until the school day ends, or removing him until you have found the right drug dose, don't let them prevent you from doing what you think is right for your son.





P.S. Do it in writing. You can draft it a million times, you can keep records and you can guarantee emotional control!
Nowadays, school take precautions to not get involved in helping since of some sex sandals and whatnot. Like you said how the nurse told you that because of his age and his development of memory. I'm not saying your son might make false accusations. But the school wouldn't want a student to say things such as "Oh, She touch me there." or in a worst scenario, "I got raped." Again, not saying your son would say any of this. The school is just being careful of what they do. So that's why you are in charge of coming to the school and cleaning him up.

Also may I suggest having him on diapers for a while. It would save you time. I know he is too old to wear them and might adapt to it again without learning the use of the toilet. But you can talk to him and say how the medication sometimes makes him unaware that he is going. And when he realize that he needs to go then he can slip off the diaper and go.
the school should deal with it - it's not fair on you, the school has no consideration on if you have plans or anything

unacceptable
Oh its ok, with any luck, there'll be a new hitler soon, and then your little boy won't be a burden on anyone anymore.
It is not the responsibility of the school to potty train your child. I am clueless as to why you have not yet potty trained your child. He is apparently trainable or you wouldn't have him in school, so what is the issue. Schools have specific rules about children who are not potty trained and these rules have stood the test of time. You say you have him in underwear, but it should be diapers until he gains control of his bowels. You need to research and contact an expert to take the proper steps to potty train your child. Good Luck and God Bless You.
Yes, and here is why.

Every kindergarten class has a teacher and 1 aide.

There are up to 32 students in the classroom. Now please understand this because it happened to me and other aides. Imagine yourself in the classroom and you may have on any given day 2,3,4 students who all of a sudden have to go or have gone in their underwear. What are you to do? Naturally you need to respond to all these children. And while you are taking care of them,(try to take care of 4 at one time) there may be a student in the classroom who is throwing up...There are so many different scenarios of what can happen at any given time. you've heard the saying, "everything happens at one." And it does, a lot.

A teachers job is to teach, and her aide position is to aid the teacher in any way she directs.... One cannot teach if one is out of the classroom cleaning up a child every day.

You need to work with your son on the weekends and teach him how to clean himself, or better yet, know the signs when he needs to use the restroom....Please don't blame the caring teachers and aides who want to instruct a child to learn. They are not babysitters.

With handicapped children, we also have children in wheel-chairs, and some of our handicapped children have siezures. Our first instruction is to take care of the child, then call the parent. I cannot tell you how many times when calling the parent, the parents says," he's your problem while he is in school." Or if the child falls down because he is not well balanced on his feet, that after calling the parent, the parent will say, "well if he isn't bleeding then just deal with it." Most parents of handicapped children alone treat us like we are their babysitters. We are not...

Pre-school and handicapped children are very fortunate to be able to attend school at all. That is because of the wonderful teachers and their aides. With the way things are going right now, these programs may be cut because of cost in the next 2-3 years across the country. The money is not there for the schools to continue in some districts.

Children with special needs require a lot of attention.. And you know that as his mother...Make our job easier by teaching him these things at home. Don't belittle the school because this sounds like it is going on everyday.