How can i put up with my grandma?

The thing is i still live with my mom..im waiting to take my ged test then go to college then move out. Me, my mom, live together.



My grandmas gonna be 91 in march..and im 19. The problem ; she always wants to be waited on. Shes always demanding...wants me to pull up her pants, get her water, food, put to bed, etc. I am usually busy doing something. She thinks i just sit on my butt waiting for her to ask me to do something. She is disrespectful when i try to talk to her.. If i tell her something she just tells me to shut up and leave me alone. All she does is watch tv, go to the bathroom, eat, and sleep. She is very hard hearing..you have to shout at her if u wanna talk to her. She has lost her mind.. she wants to keep everything and makes everything a mess.



My mom yells at me cause im not nice to grandma but..how can i be?



I go to work from 9am - 3pm. (assembly work)



I have a boyfriend..yea he can take care of himself but..he has a lot of medical problems and i have to look over him..



Also i have ptsd, depression, anxiety, anger problems, bi polar, pdd-nos, migraines.



..How can i not go nuts? I just cant tolerate it at home. Suggestions? Cause my counselor, psychiatrist and my mom has NOT helped me with this at all.How can i put up with my grandma?
Well, I'm sorry if this sounds harsh. I'm not trying to make you feel bad; you asked for advice and this is my opinion.



1) I know how hard it is to deal with older, crotchety people. But the thing is, it is our responsibility to take care of people who can't take care of themselves--especially relatives. Without your grandmother, you wouldn't exist. So my first piece of advice is, be patient. Realize that you do have a responsibility to help take care of her.



2) The other important thing is, many older people are hard to get along with because they are in pain, or feel frustrated that they have to depend on others for their basic needs, or--like you said--they are becoming senile. So don't take it personally when your grandmother is unpleasant. You need to realize that the problem is not you. You don't blame your car or your hairdryer when they break down, right? In the same way, you shouldn't blame your grandmother for needing care. She is old and what she is going through is natural. So in future when she is mean, just smile and do whatever task you need to do. There is no point in arguing or being mean back.



3) Your job is only six hours out of each day. Most people work much longer than that and still have to take care of parents and kids and grocery shopping and house-cleaning and all kinds of other stuff. I know that you're probably not used to working, since you're only 19. But try to be grateful that you have so much free time. You definitely do have time to help your mother take care of your grandmother.



4) Who is going to care for your grandmother if you don't? Don't expect your mother to do it. You are an adult and you need to help with all household chores--including looking after your grandmother. You should be grateful that your mother is letting you live with her now that you're an adult. And you should be doing a lot of work around the house to show your thanks.



5) It is a problem that you feel it's OK to look after your boyfriend, but you have a problem with your own family. You need to adjust your priorities. Also, you need to stop using your problems (depression, etc) as an excuse. You may have these challenges, but you need to stop making excuses and work harder to get over them.



Good luck.How can i put up with my grandma?
anthraxHow can i put up with my grandma?
Wow my grandma is freakishly just like that. like freakishly o.o it scares me. only difference my granny's in her fifties and i'm in my teens :/ Just be with your boyfriend more and away from your grandma. I usually: don't make any eye-contacts, no sudden movements, and avoid. hehe sounds like i'm talking about a shark xD i don't really know how to help you because I need help myself. I just usually avoid her and sometimes even ignore her phone calls and it can be stressful. heres my qestion can you answer it for me?

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